Jackson Zoo

What a blessing! The Jackson has reciprocity with the MN Zoo! (Means we get in for free with our MN Zoo membership.) We spent one afternoon there while grandma was still here with us, and we are planning to spend another afternoon there tomorrow. We were there the last weekend that the elephants were there, so we were happy to get to see the elephants before they left. Little miss was with us, strapped to mommy the whole time, but she never made it into pictures.

I don't mind

I don't mind that I'm not sleeping well. I don't mind that my back hurts and I need a haircut badly. I don't even mind that I haven't slept in the same bed as my husband for 2 weeks, or that I've gained back about 10 of the 15 pounds I recently lost. Why don't I mind these things? Because we have our precious daughter in our arms, and our family is all together. I LOVE being a mother, especially to these 4 children!

Struggling

We sure would appreciate your prayers! The kids are really struggling. (Especially Ato T and Miss I.) We had originally expected to be starting home today or Monday, and we have just found out that our paperwork was lost and hasn't even left MS yet. It still has to go through Utah and then MN before we can go home. Ato T has extra seizures when he is stressed, and his stress is definitely showing. Miss I is not sleeping well at all. And I am reaching my emotional stress limit. We knew going into this that things could change, I guess we just didn't expect to be adding an entire week onto our trip. We didn't expect it emotionally or financially.

The original plan was for Miss S to be induced Monday, consents to be signed 24 hours after birth (Tuesday), and clearance to happen 7-10 business days after consents were signed. What ACTUALLY happened is that Little Miss was born on Tuesday, and it was decided to wait for 72 hours to have consents signed, instead of 24 hours. Then we found out today that MS lost our papers until today, and won't get them signed until Monday. After that, they still have to go to Utah and then on to MN before we can go home. So realistically, we're looking at at least one more week here.

Ato T and Miss O have now missed 6 therapy sessions each, and Ato T has not been in his stander for 2 weeks, which is not good for his hips. He will also be running out of his seizure meds. soon, and he was supposed to have his blood levels checked this coming week, to make sure the dose of meds. he is on is safe for him. Little Miss also needs to see our pediatrician.

So, we would really appreciate your prayers! We know that God is using this time for our good, and that He will also work out the finances for us. It's just pretty tough in the midst of the action. We also know that soon this will all be distant memories for us. We'd just like to get home as soon as possible so we can get our kids' needs attended to.

Entrustment ceremonies

We have been blessed by Little Miss' birth mom by having an entrustment ceremony. This is a ceremony planned by one or all parts of the adoption triad, symbolizing the entrustment of the child into the adoptive family's care. Little Miss' birth mom was willing to do this when I suggested it as an option. She came over to our hotel the day after they left the hospital. It was really simple, and pretty informal, but very significant to me, and I pray to Miss S as well. I read a poem for Miss S and a poem for Little Miss, Miss S said a few nice words to us, and then we lit the candles. The tall candles represent our family and Miss S, and the short one represents Little Miss. We lit Little Miss' candle together at the same time, much like a unity candle at a wedding. Below are the poems I read.

Dear Birth Mother

by Karen Ledbetter

You gave a gift,
A brand new life,

Tiny and sweet,

A blessing indeed.

A baby girl,

Precious and small,

An answer to prayer,

No joy can compare.

No more empty arms,

I'm thrilled like no other,

You chose life and

Made me a mother.

Thank you so much

For this precious gift,

For being God's answer

to my prayers and tears.

The Answer

Not flesh of my flesh,

Nor bone of my bone,

But still miraculously

my own.

Never forget,

For a single minute,

You didn't grow under my heart,

but in it.

Family Photo

Here's our first photo as a family of 6! Today we went to the Mississippi Agricultural Museum, and had a great time! Later tonight or tomorrow I'll post some pictures from that outing. We're still waiting for ICPC to clear so we can go home! Please pray it clears quickly - we're ready to be home! Thanks!

More of Little Miss

"Little Miss" seems to be the nickname that is catching on, so I'll use it here too!

Urgent prayer request!!!

Please pray for sweet Mattie. He was born last Tuesday, and has been struggling and fighting for his life since then. The Lord is doing an amazing work in this boy's life. Please pray for his amazing family and the strength they are needing. You can read here to learn his story and follow their journey. www.tracieloux.wordpress.com

We're out of the hospital!

And at the hotel! The girls are excited! Ato T is having a tough time; not because of Miss SJ, but because of all the travel and being away from home. Enjoy the new pictures!

Introducing Miss SJ!!!

Today was a great day! Hanging out at the hospital with Miss SJ and her birth mom. The plan is that they will discharge Miss S tomorrow, and she'll then place Miss SJ with us. We'll need to be here about another 2 weeks so that all the paperwork can go through. Enjoy the pictures!

No shower

Well, I didn't get to take a shower today. Miss S (birth mom) called us at about 6:20 am to tell us she was on her way to the hospital, and we should meet her there! Now, we all know I usually move fast, but I've never seen Mike move this fast before! :) There's a long story I could tell you, but I'm tired, so for tonight you get the short version. She had the baby at 9:42 am!! It's a girl!!!! Her name is Shiloh Jeanell, 8lbs ever, 50 cm long, apgars 8 and 9, lots of hair. And she is GORGEOUS!!!! We will be waiting to post pictures until placement, which will hopefully be on Thrusday. We'll be spending all day tomorrow at the hosptial with birth mom and baby, and Thursday all day until they are released, God willing.

I know so many of you have been praying, and we have felt your prayers. THANK YOU! Please continue to pray for this hospital time to be a great time of bonding for all of us, and for Miss S and all of the transitions and emotions she'll be dealing with. She feels like a long time friend, and we're so thankful for her and her wisdom and grace throughout this process.

Thanks again!

The new plan

Well, birth mom told us that she wanted to give it one more day, and if she doesn't go into labor tonight, she will be induced tomorrow. We're really hoping this will happen. She wants us here for labor and delivery, but we just don't have the money to stay here longer than the 7-10 business days after she signs that we need to stay already. So, our first prayer is that she is able to go into labor on her own tonight. Our second prayer is that if she doesn't, she will be willing to be induced tomorrow. We're truly hoping that these changes don't mean she's questioning her decision, but in reality we know that's just what it might mean. So we are praying that she has peace of mind and heart.

We'll post when we know anything tomorrow!

Another bump

We've hit another bump in the road. Birth mom is afraid of being induced. She doesn't want the doctor to have to break her water. She's with the doctor now, and has told us she'll call us when she is don. PLEASE PRAY. If she is not induced, we will most likely have to leave, because we just can't possibly stay her for an indefinite period of time.

I will update when I know more.

Good Day

Thank you all for your prayers! Birth mom and I had a wonderful afternoon together! We went out for lunch, and then she offered to take me grocery shopping so I could stock up on food for when the rest of the family got here. She drove my by the hospital so that I would be familiar with where to go, and she took me to the dollar store for items at the grocery store that she said we could find cheaper at the dollar store. What a wonderful woman she is! I feel like we're old friends catching up!

Just as she was about to leave the hotel, Mike, Lynn and the kids drove up! So she came in to meet everyone, and we all ended up going out to eat together. Ato T was having a tough night, so we're really hoping she doesn't think it's always as crazy as it was tonight. She just called to let us know she got home safely, and she's going to call us tomorrow when she's on her way to the hospital. Her plan right now is that I would be in the room with her for delivery, and Mike will step out. Of course, we know that her plan can always change.

On a side note, we went to this great restaurant tonight called Sal and Mookie's! They had the BEST homemade ranch dressing, they were incredibly hospitable to us, and were even willing to blend up food for Ato T. We highly recommend going there if you're ever in the Jackson, MS area!

We're all off to bed now. Hopefully the next time I post I'll be able to tell you about our new baby! Thank you all again for your prayers!

Update

Well, I arrived here in Mississippi yesterday afternoon. I was not able to meet up with the birth mom yesterday. We have planned to get together for lunch today. I spent all yesterday and last night alone and wondering. Adoption feels a lot like "hurry up and wait." This morning is more of the same waiting. I miss my family and can't wait for them to be here tonight! It sounds like the drive is going as well as can be expected. Mike was able to roll up towels and make some supports for Ato T during the drive, but he was still extremely tired when they finished driving last night.

So right now I'm waiting for birth mom to come and pick me up so that we can go to lunch. The plan was for her to be here at 1:00, but she called at about 12:40 to tell me church ran late, she was going home to change and would be her within an hour. It's 1:10 right not. I'm just praying everything goes smoothly, and praying that birth mom is feeling at peace and comfortable with her decision.

As I was anxious last night, the Lord gave me these verses. "Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you. So may we boldly say 'the Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?'" (Hebrews 13:5-6)

What a wonderful message from my Heavenly Father! It brought peace to my heart, and I have continued to read and ponder these words.

The Plan

I will be flying out to go to Mississippi early Saturday morning. This was the cheapest flight we could find, which is why I'm going down early. Mike and the kids will follow in the van, with his mom, who has volunteered to go with us and help with the older 3 kids while we do hospital. Mandy (the dog) will go my parents farm and have a fun "vacation" with their dogs!

I'm really hoping that flying down 2 days early will allow me to spend some time with the birth mom, but we need to talk to her and see what her schedule will allow. If nothing else, I'll spend time shopping for groceries for the time we'll be there and checking out things to do in the area. We'll be in Mississippi 7-10 business days, waiting for the interstate compact to go through, and then we'll drive home.

Right now, the plan is to fly Mike's mom home once the hospital stuff is done. Unless we have a very crabby baby, then plans could change. :)

I'll do my best to keep you updated on our blog. Thanks for the prayers!

Here we go!

We matched with a wonderful woman last night, and her due date is this Sunday, October 23! She is in Mississippi, and we will be traveling there for the birth. We're currently waiting to her from our agency, because she was going to ask her doctor today if she could schedule an induction, to be sure we would be there for the birth. We are excited and flustered all at once! Mike has been in New York on work since Tuesday, and is due to come home Friday. He's been doing lots of financial work for us in between his meetings, and I'm at home trying to get laundry and packing done, and looking for a place for us to stay.

We were hoping to have some of our fundraising done before another baby came, but we are ecstatic that it is happening so quickly. Today Mike secured a loan for us, so that we could cover all of the fees, and we still hope to hold a dinner in December to help us cover some of the costs. However, we do still need to pay for our travel and stay in Mississippi. If the Lord is calling you to it, please feel free to make a donation to our adoption fund. You can use the paypal button at the top our our web page.

Most of all, we ask for your prayers. Especially for our birth mom, and all the decisions and transitions she will be dealing with in the next few days. And for our kids and their stress levels during this time of anticipation.

Thank you all so much for your support! We will do our best to keep the blog updated as we have time and information.

UPDATE: "Our" birth mom is being induced Monday at 1:30!!!!!

S: if you're reading this, we can't wait to meet you and we love you already!

Photos

After 2-3 sessions with the kids, I got some photos I feel good about blowing up for our "professional" photos for this year. I really wish I could figure out how to use the external flash for my camera, because I would have gotten so many other great shots if I could figure it out. So that's my goal for this fall. Maybe I'll get it figured out in time to do some shots of a baby. No news on the baby front, but we know that it will all happen when God is ready for it to happen. We continue to pray for our future child and his or her birth mom.

Enjoy the photos!

We're NOT having a baby .. not now at least.

We are sad, but feel we have made the right decision. We took some time to research the facilitator that had found the birth mom we matched with, and what we found was NOT favorable. This particular facilitator had many complaints from adoptive couples that made us question our ability to use this facilitator's services. I prefer not to mention the name of the facilitator, as we did not personally have a bad experience with them. We are sad, because we truly believe this birth mom has every good intention in making an adoption plan for her baby. But we also know that in good conscience we cannot in any way support this adoption facilitation company. Please join us in praying for this birth mom, D and her baby girl. Prayers may include peace, understanding, and guidance in her next steps. Thank you all for your prayers and support! We know our baby is out there, and God will bring him or her to us at the time that the Lord has already planned out.

We're having a baby!!!!!!

If you couldn't guess by the new background - it's a girl! We spoke with a wonderful lady on Friday night, and couldn't be happier that she has chosen us to be the parents of her little girl! She's due on December 7, and we can't wait! We're excited to have some time to get to know her before the baby is born. As we walk through this next few months, we ask for your prayers. Especially for this wonderful woman who we'll call D., and the child she is carrying. Prayers that our relationship could continue to grow, and she is able to feel comfortable with us. Prayers that the Lord would shine His light through us. Thank you all! Praise the Lord for His perfect timing!

Roller Coaster

Well, we are in the full swing of the domestic adoption roller coaster. Each time, I think I'll handle it better, and each time I fail to. I find myself calling out to God dozens of times every day. I am constantly asking to to take my anxiety and worries about being "chosen." Here's how domestic adoption works: for lack of a better term, we basically have to "market" ourselves to wonderful women who find themselves in a situation that they do not have the resources or reserves to handle themselves. We have a 19 page profile, and we "submit" ourselves to "situations." Then we wait to hear. - Yes. or No.

When we were waiting for Miss O and Miss I, we were working with one agency who showed our profile to potential birth parents for the most part, without telling us first. This time, we are working with an adoption facilitator, who works with 9 different agencies, and most of those agencies ask us before they present us to potential birth parents. That has been increasing the anxiety for me, as I feel like I'm constantly waiting to hear. So, the Lord is drawing me closer to Him once again. Thank you Lord, for this opportunity to grow in my faith and relationship with you.

Waiting

For me, the hardest part of adoption is waiting. It always feels like we need to hurry up and get everything done. Then we wait. Hurry up and wait. We were not chosen today, for the first time of what I'm sure could be many before our child is in our arms with us. So, I have chosen a theme song for myself during this period. It lifts my spirits and reminds me why we're adoptiong again. Not for our glory, but for God's glory. Not just because we want another child (although we do), but because God is calling us to bring another child into our family. It's comforting to know that the Lord has already chosen that child for us. So we patiently wait, and serve and worship as we wait for God to reveal His perfect plan for our family.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=FWI-iZsIKik&feature=related

State Fair celebration

We went home and gave the kids a nap after our finalization brunch. When they finally woke up, we packed them up and headed to the State Fair for more celebrating. Ato T had a blast this year! Very different from last year, when he mostly cried or just tolerated it. We took him on the giant slide and the carousel, and he ablolutely LOVED them both! The girls had a grand time, too! We lasted about 4 hours this year.

The girls both love jumping on the giant trampolene! No fear at all this year!

Watching his sisters jump.

Finalization!

We re-finalized Ato T's adoption this past Thursday! Even though this is just a formality, we were still pretty excited! Mike's family all came (except Uncle Jose, who had to work). We followed the hearing with a family brunch at Perkins!

First day of school 2010

Monday was our first official day of school for the 2010-2011 school year. We're off to a great start!